Like, I could try to write cleverly, but instead I prefer to write
simply and say what I feel. My sense of humor will creep in, but
that's a pretty important part of me anyway.
_________________________________________________________________
* How do you FEEL about food. Why do you eat?
Food good.
I really enjoy food, different tastes, different styles, and eat for
pleasure. Never met an Asian cuisine I didn't like. Sometimes, I guess,
I eat for comfort, but that happens less and less.
* What is your biggest flaw?
I live too much in my head. I need to live in my body/ in the moment more.
These sound different, but to me are the same.
* What is your hangup with your mother?
No hangups in the conventional sense; we just never bonded. My family
is dysfunctional in that it lacked the emotional depth for bonding.
I've changed myself so that bonding is natural and desirable.
I did buy her apartment when it went condo, and am only joking when I make
a remark about evicting her. Really, I'm joking.
* 3 favorite authors
John Irving, Tom Robbins, James Ellroy, Jerome Charyn. (The last two
write darkly passionate stories. Ellroy's stories frequently speak of
"compromised redemptions" which appeal to my streak of Romanticism.)
Hey, that was four.
* What are the hallmarks of success in life?
If you're happy, that's success. Obviously, this is very individual.
I am generally happy, although still working on my need for more of a
sense of connectedness to people.
* What is your biggest mental fuck-up?
Too great a fondness for absurdity and silliness, while occasionally
lacking the right timing. I can also be a little too serious and intense.
(Oxymoron? Yup!)
* What is your favorite animal? Describe it.
The armadillo, since it's the most absurd creature on the planet. I used
to see them in their natural state (flattened on I95) in south Florida.
Once or twice I stopped traffic to save one.
* How long do you usually know a girl before you kiss her?
Anwhere from first to third date. I don't do the kiss at the end of
first date ritual; I prefer a kiss to be laced with a little more
romantic/sexual tension. Anticipation is also fun.
Jump her?
Jumping is mutual, which is usually a little later on. A lot
depends on the nature of the relationship, if the intent is mostly
physical or commitment-oriented.
Dump her?
There hasn't been any dumping, on either side, for some years. The worst
that happens is that the relationship runs its course, from one partner's
perspective, before the other's, so that one is a little disappointed.
I'm still close with, and still see, each woman I've been involved with
in SF. (Danced the Maypole with one today. Hmmm... I mean that literally,
not figuratively, although that would be good metaphor.)
* How old were you when you first kissed?
I think in fourth grade.
Had sex?
In my sophomore year in college, around age 20. This was my first love.
Smoked Pot?
I think I was around 22. Doesn't do much for me.
* Do you use recreational drugs? What? When? Still?
Caffeine, alcohol, but that's about it. I drink very little, just my
personal preference. Sometimes, one glass is enough for me to become
what my sister calls a "cheap date" in which state I'm very easily
amused. Come to think of it, I'm normally easily amused.
* Have you ever been married/lived with someone?
I've lived with women about three times, never married, never quite
got that far.
Who worked?
Always, both of us. I can't see myself getting involved with someone
who's not independent, and that usually means two careers.
Who cooked?
I cooked with my Visa (tm) card about half the time. When she cooked, I
usually joined her in the kitchen to keep her company and to do menial
stuff before and after. Sometimes it was fun to molest the cook;
sometimes I got chased out of the kitchen.
Who cleaned?
The maid. I'm very neat (not obsessive. Well, not much.) so that I
can afford to have a maid clean up about once a month.
* Do you know how to cook? Do you like to cook? What are the things
you cook best?
See "who cooked."
* Have you ever used any of the following: gel, hairspray, mousse,
eyeliner, cologne, deoderant, conditioner, zit cream, aftershave
For a short period I tried mousse, since I was tired of that way my
hair looked. Tried cologne, since smell can be fun.
* What was the most crazy thing you ever did as an adolescent?
College student?
Can't remember anything that I'd characterize as crazy. I was a very
different human being back then...
Working stiff?
... and I'm still reinventing myself some. Craziest thing was in the
backseat racing up I35 in Dallas. Her sister was driving.
* If you were a fruit or vegetable, what would you be?
Maybe grapes, mostly what you see is what you get, sometimes a surprise,
conveniently packaged. (I don't know what the last part has to do with
any, but like I say, I can be easily amused.)
If I were, what would I be?
Cactus. Ask me why.
* If you were at a party, and across the room you saw a very
handsome man and your girlfriend chatting quite animatedly, what
would you do?
Well, since neither of us the clinging types, I'd continue with the normal
flow of whatever I'm doing. Flirting is fun, for most anyone. On the
other hand, I might enjoy a little jealousy, since she's important to me.
When the normal flow of events brought us near, I'd try to read her, and
see if she wants me to join. If so, I'd do so. It would be hard not to
enter her personal space in such a manner that most observers could tell
that we're very close, even if we're not in physical contact. It might be
interesting to see if our flirting adventures enhanced our sexual tension.
* Do you think there is life after death?
The universe should work that way; I like the idea of rebirth/
reincarnation. I can't say I believe in it, since I can't sense it.
On other planets?
Probably. The more I learn about chaotic systems, it seems like the
probability is mighty high.
* Are you psychic?
Maybe. My sister, who's sensitive to this, tells me I am, but can't
do anything until the time is right.
* Are you psycho?
Sometimes when Comedy demands. (I don't know what that means, either.)
* Do you think you have any sort of understanding of what it would
be like to go completely insane?
In the past, when I've known a little despair...
* Were you ever in the armed forces?
No. Planned to get out of draft, but that proved unnecessary.
* Did you ever kiss a girl who had big, hairsprayed bangs?
No, my insurance doesn't cover that.
* What was the most important scientific achievement in the last 50
years?
The evolution of the combination of chaos and complexity disciplines,
which may really give us the tools to understand real natural and
organizational behavior. Maybe my true calling lies in the application
of this stuff to large social structures.
* What is the biggest problem all women have?
There is none, since people are individuals. In my personal experience,
the biggest problem I've directly observed involves patterns of
self-destructive relationships. A lot of women friends have an
abusive relationship, eventually the guy ends it, and then the woman
repeats the pattern. This rewards the abusive guys, which makes it
worse for other women.
* What is the biggest problem all men have?
(Same remark about individuals.) From what I've seen firsthand, including
my (old) self, is that men are not socialized to communicate. I mean
this in expressive terms (we're not articulate,) internally (we don't
know what we feel,) and in listening (we don't listen very well.) I could
still do a little better, myself. Of course, this is Not Our Fault,
since we suffer from a Daily Cycle of Testosterone Poisoning.
* What is the biggest problem with our society?
None. The problem with most individuals is the inability to find
our own moral compasses, since institutions have failed us.
* Do you prefer plants or animals?
Animals are more affectionate. On the other hand, I've got plants
in the house (and garden,) no animals.
* If you won $1 million, what would be the very first thing you
would buy? The second? The last?
I'd fix up my condo/flat, wood floors, new windows, fix the fireplaces.
Also, I'd increase the monies I send to the non-profits I'm involved with.
* Who has been the greatest influence in your life?
There are many, including some of the authors cited above. Anyone who
can make a strong artistic/emotional/intellectual statement will affect.
One is Leonard Cohen, who, of course, *rules*.
* How do people describe you?
As I've become the human I intend to be, I've actually heard myself
called a "mensch". This feels like a cliche out of my family past,
however, I've tried hard to become a deeply ok human, and people have
responded.
* How do you describe yourself?
I've just articulated some of this: "deeply ok," and a good communicator.
Also, I find that I take myself less seriously over time, but also
find my passions deepening. Sounds like another oxymoron, but I guess that's
just human. Hey, and I leave the toilet seat down.
* Do you subscribe to any magazines/newspapers? Which?
I read a lot, but most of the periodicals are technical. I get the
Examiner, since it has my favorite comics (Zippy, Sylvia, Dilbert) and
Cintra Wilson's columns.
* What are your favorite shoes?
My cordovan wingtips, since they have character, and have gotten me
through a lot. Also, in my current circles, no one else wears wingtips.
And for you: my instincts tell me that there's both an extroverted
Sonic who is bold, smart, and assertive, and an introverted Sonic who may
still be a little shy and has been disappointed once too often.
* Is there any truth in this, or am I full of shit? (I figure
the latter is ok, if one if full of shit *entertainingly*.)
* If this is close enough to the truth, am I talking to both
Sonics?
Hey, now it's your turn...
___________________________________________
Craig Newmark
cnewmark@well.com
http://www.well.com/www/cnewmark/
| go back |