Tue, 8 Aug 1995 23:11:18 -0700
A: Jason Weisberger
How do you FEEL about food? Why do you eat?
A: Food? Something best prepared by others. Why? I start shaking violently and nearly fall down.
What is your biggest flaw?
A: Seeing trust as a black and white issue.
3 favorite authors
A: Norman Mclean, Hunter Thompson, Carl Von Clausevitz
What are the hallmarks of success in life?
A: Am I happy? Look - I'm successful.
What is your biggest mental fuck-up?
A: Still think America is the greatest place on Earth.
What is your favorite animal?
A: Barks, eats with several heads, slobbers in the leg of Satan.
How long do you usually know a girl before you kiss her?
A: Depends on our relative distance from the equator.
A: See above.
A: Depends on her earning potential and TRW.
How old were you when you first kissed?
Do you use recreational drugs?
A: I guess I have free license here.
A: No Parking, Wednesdays 3pm-6pm.
Have you ever been married/lived with someone?
Do you know how to cook?
Do you like to cook?
What are the things you cook best?
A: Taco Bell, Arby's, Burger King and those all in one pasta meals from Trader Joe's. Indian when I'm forced.
Have you ever used any of the following (which?): gel hairspray mousse cologne deoderant conditioner zitcream aftershave
A: Gel, mousse (when I was out of Gel), cologne, deoderant, conditioner and aftershave.
What was the most crazy thing you ever did as an adolescent?
A: Convinced Damien Stein he could fly, introduced him to the roof of my parents' garage.
as a college student?
A: Ran for College Board, won.
as a working stiff?
A: Invested lots and lots of money in my own Comedy Club.
If you were a fruit or a vegetable, what would you be?
A: Broccoli - both the cancer and the cure.
If I were, what would I be?
A: Whatever you wanted, I guess. Just don't call me on the phone and complain about it when I'm going through a crisis.
If you were at a party, and across the room you saw a very handsome man and your girlfriend chatting quite animatedly, what would you do?
A: Trust her, and chew own my spleen until she ditched him.
Do you think there is life after death?
On other planets?
Are you psychic?
Do you think you have any sort of understanding of what it would be like to completely insane?
Were you ever in the armed forces?
Did you ever kiss a girl who had big, hairsprayed bangs?
What was the most important scientific achievement in the last 50 years?
A: Microwave Oven.
What is the biggest problem...
...all women have?
A: Lack of a Y Chromosome.
...all men have?
A: Women lack Y chromosomes, understanding impossible.
...with our society?
A: People just don't read anymore.
Which do you prefer:
A: Animals can eat them.
If you won $1 million, what would be the very first thing you would buy?
A: A big fucking jet airplane.
A: I spent it all on the damn airplane.
A: Didja see the thing about the airplane?
Who has been the greatest influence in your life?
A: Herbert E. Roney, Vice-President of Public Affairs, Santa Monica College
How do people describe you?
How do you describe yourself?
A: In a far different manner.
Do you subscribe to any magazines/newspapers?
A: Newsweek, Time, TV Guide, Swank, Utne Reader, Buzz, Soldier of Fortune
What are your favorite shoes?
A: Keds, I remember when I was a little girl.
A: I've pretty much said it all, however, I'd like a copy the Rand Study these questions have gone to forward - please let me know if I'm abnormal.