webshite/applications submitted

Tue, 8 Aug 1995 23:11:18 -0700

A: Jason Weisberger

A: jweis@primenet.com

Home Page:
A: http://www.qtime.com/~jweis

How do you FEEL about food? Why do you eat?
A: Food? Something best prepared by others. Why? I start shaking violently and nearly fall down.

What is your biggest flaw?
A: Seeing trust as a black and white issue.

3 favorite authors
A: Norman Mclean, Hunter Thompson, Carl Von Clausevitz

What are the hallmarks of success in life?
A: Am I happy? Look - I'm successful.

What is your biggest mental fuck-up?
A: Still think America is the greatest place on Earth.

What is your favorite animal?
A: Cerebus
Describe it.
A: Barks, eats with several heads, slobbers in the leg of Satan.

How long do you usually know a girl before you kiss her?
A: Depends on our relative distance from the equator.
Jump her?
A: See above.
Dump her?
A: Depends on her earning potential and TRW.

How old were you when you first kissed?
A: 15
Had sex
A: 15
Smoked Pot?
A: 13

Do you use recreational drugs?
A: No

A: I guess I have free license here.

A: No Parking, Wednesdays 3pm-6pm.

A: Yes

Have you ever been married/lived with someone?
A: Cohabitated

Who worked?
A: Everyone
Who cooked?
A: Both
Who cleaned?
A: Both

Do you know how to cook?
A: Yes

Do you like to cook?
A: Yes

What are the things you cook best?
A: Taco Bell, Arby's, Burger King and those all in one pasta meals from Trader Joe's. Indian when I'm forced.

Have you ever used any of the following (which?): gel hairspray mousse cologne deoderant conditioner zitcream aftershave
A: Gel, mousse (when I was out of Gel), cologne, deoderant, conditioner and aftershave.

What was the most crazy thing you ever did as an adolescent?
A: Convinced Damien Stein he could fly, introduced him to the roof of my parents' garage.
as a college student?
A: Ran for College Board, won.
as a working stiff?
A: Invested lots and lots of money in my own Comedy Club.

If you were a fruit or a vegetable, what would you be?
A: Broccoli - both the cancer and the cure.
If I were, what would I be?
A: Whatever you wanted, I guess. Just don't call me on the phone and complain about it when I'm going through a crisis.

If you were at a party, and across the room you saw a very handsome man and your girlfriend chatting quite animatedly, what would you do?
A: Trust her, and chew own my spleen until she ditched him.

Do you think there is life after death?
A: Yes

On other planets?
A: No

Are you psychic?
A: No

Do you think you have any sort of understanding of what it would be like to completely insane?
A: Yes

A: Hello.

Were you ever in the armed forces?
A: No

Did you ever kiss a girl who had big, hairsprayed bangs?
A: No

What was the most important scientific achievement in the last 50 years?
A: Microwave Oven.

What is the biggest problem...

...all women have?
A: Lack of a Y Chromosome.

...all men have?
A: Women lack Y chromosomes, understanding impossible.

...with our society?
A: People just don't read anymore.

Which do you prefer:
A: Plants

A: Animals can eat them.

If you won $1 million, what would be the very first thing you would buy?
A: A big fucking jet airplane.

The second?
A: I spent it all on the damn airplane.

The last?
A: Didja see the thing about the airplane?

Who has been the greatest influence in your life?
A: Herbert E. Roney, Vice-President of Public Affairs, Santa Monica College

How do people describe you?
A: Unforgivingly

How do you describe yourself?
A: In a far different manner.

Do you subscribe to any magazines/newspapers?
A: Yes

A: Newsweek, Time, TV Guide, Swank, Utne Reader, Buzz, Soldier of Fortune

What are your favorite shoes?
A: Keds, I remember when I was a little girl.

Additional Comments
A: I've pretty much said it all, however, I'd like a copy the Rand Study these questions have gone to forward - please let me know if I'm abnormal.

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