Sat, 26 Aug 1995 21:43:42 -0700
Name:
A: James T Gunderson
Email:
A: gundersn@qdeck.com
Home Page:
A: http://www.qdeck.com/~gundersn/
How do you FEEL about food? Why do you eat?
A: Well the greasy stuff doesn't feel nice, but whipped cream feels like a nice place to rest my head.
What is your biggest flaw?
A: I have no chin
3 favorite authors
A: The editorial cartoonists for the LA Times
What are the hallmarks of success in life?
A: dying old.
What is your biggest mental fuck-up?
A: I have more mental fucks than physical
What is your favorite animal?
A: dead porcupine
Describe it.
A: I just did
How long do you usually know a girl before you kiss her?
A: I kiss on the first date
Jump her?
A: My bum leg won't let me jump. She has to attack
Dump her?
A: I have never dumped someone. I always get dumped
How old were you when you first kissed?
A: Does my mother count?
Had sex
A: 24
Smoked Pot?
A: 17
Do you use recreational drugs?
A: No
What?
A: Who?
When?
A: Where?
Still?
A: No
Have you ever been married/lived with someone?
A: Married
Who worked?
A: yes
Who cooked?
A: no
Who cleaned?
A: yes
Do you know how to cook?
A: Yes
Do you like to cook?
A: No
What are the things you cook best?
A: chicken cordon bleu
Have you ever used any of the following (which?): gel hairspray mousse cologne deoderant conditioner zitcream aftershave
A: yes, all of them at once. It was so flammable my breath ignited it.
What was the most crazy thing you ever did as an adolescent?
A: Went to college
as a college student?
A: Graduated
as a working stiff?
A: My life is a crazy powder keg. Really, I mean it.
If you were a fruit or a vegetable, what would you be?
A: You are what you eat.
If I were, what would I be?
A: Two cantaloupes?
If you were at a party, and across the room you saw a very handsome man and your girlfriend chatting quite animatedly, what would you do?
A: Hope they get it on so I can go after that cute redhead next to me
Do you think there is life after death?
A: No
On other planets?
A: Yes
Are you psychic?
A: No
Do you think you have any sort of understanding of what it would be like to completely insane?
A: Yes
Why?
A: Insane is just a different belief system way way way out of the ordinary
Were you ever in the armed forces?
A: No
Did you ever kiss a girl who had big, hairsprayed bangs?
A: No
What was the most important scientific achievement in the last 50 years?
A: the pill
What is the biggest problem...
...all women have?
A: monthly spasic attacks
...all men have?
A: testosterone
...with our society?
A: heterogenius mixture
Which do you prefer:
A: Plants
Why?
A: you dont have to bury dead plants
If you won $1 million, what would be the very first thing you would buy?
A: a lotto ticket
The second?
A: another ticket
The last?
A: a chin implant
Who has been the greatest influence in your life?
A: John Wayne Bobbit
How do people describe you?
A: cantankerous\0cantankerous
How do you describe yourself?
A: in woobbit\0in words
Do you subscribe to any magazines/newspapers?
A: Yes
Which?
A: hollywood reporter
What are your favorite shoes?
A: 9 1/2
Additional Comments
A: Have You Seen This Man?
