webshite/applications submitted

Sat, 2 Sep 1995 02:46:02 -0700

A: Jim

A: http://www.telalink.net/~zoomst/vagabondage/

Would you prefer your email be linked, unlinked, or anonymous?
A: What fun is it if you don't link it?

How do you FEEL about food? Why do you eat?
A: You have to immediately admire someone who places food above character flaws. I just realized as I begun to formulate a response here that I rarely eat for pleasure anymore. I used to, but it was easy, I grew up with gourmat parents, worked in a gourmet deli, but since I've moved to SF, I'm eating way to much Taco Bell. Cheap, lazy sustinence in a Beef MexiMelt.

What is your biggest flaw?
A: I know exactly who I am when I'm writing but I keep forgetting when I'm talking.

3 favorite authors
A: Three? Cruel, like asking a mother with a hundred children to pick three. Tonight I would select Heinlein for history, Lewis Carroll for psychosis, Edward Abbey for humor, and Nietsche for angst. So that's four. Alas.

What are the hallmarks of success in life?
A: Brutal honesty. Persistent Curiousity. Healthy Sarcasm. Love.

What is your biggest mental fuck-up?
A: I tried. I tried Sonic, I tried to tell you, but this goddamn box isn't big enough to hold my neurosis...

What is your favorite animal?
A: Woman
Describe it.
A: My favorite animal simply because I cannot describe her.

How long do you usually know a girl before you kiss her?
A: Relying upon past history, between eight minutes and six years.
Jump her?
A: Between twelve minutes and six years, two hours.
Dump her?
A: Between two months and two months, two days. Oops.

How old were you when you first kissed?
A: 14
Had sex
A: 16
Smoked Pot?
A: 15

Do you use recreational drugs?
A: Yes

A: Marijuana, Lysergic Acid Dythalamide, Psilocybin, Crystal Methamphetamine, Alcohol

A: Occasionally

A: Yes

Have you ever been married/lived with someone?
A: Neither

Who worked?
Who cooked?
Who cleaned?

Do you know how to cook?
A: No

Do you like to cook?
A: Yes

What are the things you cook best?
A: I make a mean marinara sauce. The Cyborganics dug my five layer dip. I also make one hell of a mess.

Have you ever used any of the following (which?): gel hairspray mousse cologne deoderant conditioner zitcream aftershave
A: When I was in junior high I used gel. My hair gets really angry and does odd things unless I let it grow. So I do.

What was the most crazy thing you ever did as an adolescent?
A: Sure, you leave PLENTY of room for these stories. I was hanging from this rather ornate street sign in the affluent suburb of the city I lived in with a large wrench when the police car came over the hill...he was less impressed with my sheepish grin than he was with the large collection of traffic signs in the trunk of my best friend's car...
as a college student?

A: I've been meaning to write this down. 2:30 PM Bowling Green, Kentucky. It is early April, and in the middle of this cold spell the temperature suddenly snaps and it's eighty degrees. I just got out of the longest history class in, well, history, and I run immediately into my roommate. He's got the semi-crazed expression easily explained away by the ten strip of acid in his hands...an hour later it seems completely obvious that we must go to the beach. Now. Panama City Florida is over six hundred miles away. My Jeep, a 77 CJ-7 pieced together with steel and bumper stickers, waits faithfully. No top, windsheild folded to the hood and secured by an old leather belt cut in half, steering so badly out of alignment the wheel moves like the yoke of an oil tanker, it seems like the perfect craft for this mission. I will tell you this, I will never feel anything like that seven hour trip. We hit the bearch at one, and was back in the Jeep at two, windsheild up now, driving home. It started snowing just outs ide of Alabama. My face didn't restore it's normal color for over a week. I miss the Jeep.
as a working stiff?

A: About a week ago I got up in a meeting at Sega and told the dozen or so executives (my boss, his boss, and his boss) that they were all completely wrong and that they were fools for not devoting more money for online research. I'm either getting canned or getting a raise.

If you were a fruit or a vegetable, what would you be?
A: A lemon.
If I were, what would I be?
A: Lemonade.

If you were at a party, and across the room you saw a very handsome man and your girlfriend chatting quite animatedly, what would you do?
A: I probably wouldn't see. I'm notoriously dense when it comes to shit like that. I always get in trouble for flirting and never understand why. Don't misunderstand, I have a healthy dose of jealousy, I just recognize it as self-doubt. When it kicks in it usually means it's my fault...

Do you think there is life after death?
A: Yes

On other planets?
A: Yes

Are you psychic?
A: Yes

Do you think you have any sort of understanding of what it would be like to completely insane?
A: No

A: I've gone out there a considerable distance, but I've always felt completely capable of making it back. When you can;t make it back anymore, that's madness. I've never been that far...

Were you ever in the armed forces?
A: No

Did you ever kiss a girl who had big, hairsprayed bangs?
A: No

What was the most important scientific achievement in the last 50 years?
A: The Zippo lighter. I quit smoking and still carry a Zippo to remind me what scientific perfection looks like. Simple.

What is the biggest problem...

...all women have?
A: fear

...all men have?
A: fear

...with our society?
A: We're so wrapped up in bullshit that we forget to LIVE a little bit more everyday. That and billboards. Billboards piss me off. And telephones. If there is any more powerful indicator of the degradation of mankind the the telephone, you show it to me! But you know how I feel about that already...

Which do you prefer:
A: Animals

A: More soul.

If you won $1 million, what would be the very first thing you would buy?
A: A tin of Altoids, the Curiously Strong Peppermint

The second?
A: A 1970 Chevrolet Malibu SS Convertible

The last?
A: A tin of Altoids, the Curiously Strong Peppermint

Who has been the greatest influence in your life?
A: David Jaggers

How do people describe you?
A: It depends heavily on how long they talk to me and my Orangepeel Factor at the time. (Orangepeel Factor: How many layer of not you that you put on top of yourself in social situations) Superficially - The guy with the hair.

How do you describe yourself?
A: I am trying really hard not to. I self analize till it is actually physically painful and I've learned a lot, but nothing I'd think to write here.

Do you subscribe to any magazines/newspapers?
A: Yes

A: Might, Spin, Wired, New Media, Film Threat, Spy, The Crash Update, MacWorld, Playboy (for the pictures), American Photo

What are your favorite shoes?
A: An old pair of Doc Martens. Only boot that has every worked with my foot.

Additional Comments
A: I've put far more time into this than I should have. I laughed at some of your questions the first time through but now they all sorta make sense. I'm very tired now, and I'd very much like a backrub. You would have gotten longer rants if you had made your input boxes bigger. 2:51 in Redwood City, and this is Vagabond Jim saying sleep well, Sonic, whomever you are.... VJ 9-2-95

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