Fri Mar 15 8:32:59 1996
A: satan's hat blocker
How do you FEEL about food? Why do you eat?
A: Eating is only the first step of my plan to internalize the universe.
What is your biggest flaw?
A: I fall in love too easily
3 favorite authors
A: James Baldwin, Richard Adams, John Milton
What are the hallmarks of success in life?
What is your biggest mental fuck-up?
A: I do what I'm told to do
What is your favorite animal?
A: a crow
A: moody, but the folks like her
How long do you usually know a girl before you kiss her?
A: a week or two
A: a month or three
A: a year or five
How old were you when you first kissed?
Do you use recreational drugs?
A: pot, alcohol
A: 2:16 AM EST
Have you ever been married/lived with someone?
A: we but she was better at it
Do you know how to cook?
Do you like to cook?
What are the things you cook best?
A: anything from a box or wrapped in plastic
Have you ever used any of the following (which?): gel hairspray mousse cologne deodorant conditioner zitcream aftershave
A: mousse and deodorant, but I'll never be clean enough
What was the most crazy thing you ever did as an adolescent?
A: I filled a shopping cart with at least $500 worth of software and electronics at a local dept. store, pushed it to the front of the store, stuffed it into my backpack and walked out.
as a college student?
A: I got married and divorced
as a working stiff?
A: I stole a box of paperclips, the kind that look like spaceships
If you were a fruit or a vegetable, what would you be?
A: a skinless grape
If I were, what would I be?
A: I hardly know you ma'am
If you were at a party, and across the room you saw a very handsome man and your girlfriend chatting quite animatedly, what would you do?
A: follow him into the bathroom and compare dick sizes
Do you think there is life after death?
On other planets?
Are you psychic?
Do you think you have any sort of understanding of what it would be like to completely insane?
A: I've been in the same zip code if you get my meaning
Were you ever in the armed forces?
Did you ever kiss a girl who had big, hairsprayed bangs?
What was the most important scientific achievement in the last 50 years?
A: the steadicam
What is the biggest problem...
...all women have?
A: they can't take autonomy for granted
...all men have?
A: they take autonomy for granted
...with our society?
A: joan osborne
Which do you prefer:
A: a plant killed my brother
If you won $1 million, what would be the very first thing you would buy?
A: four million quarters
A: ten million dimes
A: a hundred million pennies
Who has been the greatest influence in your life?
A: I haven't met her yet
How do people describe you?
A: a quiet fellow, kept to himself mostly
How do you describe yourself?
A: lord of the underworld, master of all I survey
Do you subscribe to any magazines/newspapers?
A: hotwired, feed, suck, traffic, nyw
What are your favorite shoes?
A: I don't rock filas, I only rock addidas
A: how can you be so skinny and live SO fat?