Tue Mar 19 19:22:53 1996
Name:
A: grantholio
Email:
A: grant@tiac.net
Home Page:
A: http://www.tiac.net/users/grant/
How do you FEEL about food? Why do you eat?
A: I feel inferior around food, like its got something over me...oh...about food. I feel about as strongly about food as my car feels about gas.
What is your biggest flaw?
A: Think to much.
3 favorite authors
A: Will Self, Pynchon, T. C. Boyle
What are the hallmarks of success in life?
A: Phat-ass laces in one's sneakers and a jibber in your pocket.
What is your biggest mental fuck-up?
A: Thinking being a hotel consultant would be remotely interesting and rewarding.
What is your favorite animal?
A: Three-toed friggin' sloth
Describe it.
A: Way past slow. How can it be that slow?
How long do you usually know a girl before you kiss her?
A: Good while
Jump her?
A: Good while squared
Dump her?
A: Good while squared times c divided by inverse square of weisenstern's laid-back quotient
How old were you when you first kissed?
A: 5th grade
Had sex
A: 10th grade
Smoked Pot?
A: 11th grade
Do you use recreational drugs?
A: Yes
What?
A: Whatever Robert Parrish is using and Len Bias isn't.
When?
A: As my own personal physician I am compelled to medicate myself only when the symptoms deem it appropriate.
Still?
A: Yes
Have you ever been married/lived with someone?
A: Neither
Who worked?
A: Both
Who cooked?
A: Both
Who cleaned?
A: Both.
Do you know how to cook?
A: Yes
Do you like to cook?
A: No
What are the things you cook best?
A: I can cook anything (hotel school culinary classes). But it's mostly mexican and cajun if I'm saying.
Have you ever used any of the following (which?): gel hairspray mousse cologne deodorant conditioner zitcream aftershave
A: Deodorant mainly. It keeps my hair "perky" on top.
What was the most crazy thing you ever did as an adolescent?
A: Dressed up as Don King at carnival. Accompanied by cohorts masquerading as Elvis and Billie Jean King. (Punchline)
as a college student?
A: Class E felony, dropped. The ATM had it coming.
as a working stiff?
A: Sailed 50 feet through the air on a sno-tube last weekend? I don't know, plenty stupid shit I guess.
If you were a fruit or a vegetable, what would you be?
A: I think I'm already a vegetable, actually.
If I were, what would I be?
A: Pomegranate. Hard to spell, though.
If you were at a party, and across the room you saw a very handsome man and your girlfriend chatting quite animatedly, what would you do?
A: I'd turn into Joe Steakhead and kick his ass? Probably not. Try not to dwell, maybe.
Do you think there is life after death?
A: Yes
On other planets?
A: Yes
Are you psychic?
A: No
Do you think you have any sort of understanding of what it would be like to completely insane?
A: No
Why?
A: As demented as I ever feel, I've got nothing on the people on Rikki Lake.
Were you ever in the armed forces?
A: No
Did you ever kiss a girl who had big, hairsprayed bangs?
A: Yes
What was the most important scientific achievement in the last 50 years?
A: Fax, modem, I don't know? I'm quite fond of the Taser and spray-on hair as far as real substantive advances go, though.
What is the biggest problem...
...all women have?
A: Failing to realize that men are idiots and that most can't help it.
...all men have?
A: Failing to accept that we're idiots at heart.
...with our society?
A: Inability to walk a mile in someone else's clogs.
Which do you prefer:
A: Animals
Why?
A: Plants aren't too much fun too watch. But then again I've never smoked an animal.
If you won $1 million, what would be the very first thing you would buy?
A: Super-sick router
The second?
A: SGI Indy
The last?
A: A bull mastif named Darth
Who has been the greatest influence in your life?
A: Completely stuck here; rents, friends.
How do people describe you?
A: Mercurial, flaky, bright, good-natured but cynical
How do you describe yourself?
A: Completely well-balanced, hard-working, optimistic, an upstanding citizen. I interview well.
Do you subscribe to any magazines/newspapers?
A: No
Which?
A: I don't subscribe to subscribing, but I end up reading delphi informant, wired, harpers and juggs a lot.
What are your favorite shoes?
A: brown docs, high
Additional Comments
A: This is more info than I would typically divulge in a week's worth of dates.