Sun Jun 16 9:57:04 1996
A: Jedmo Diaz
Would you prefer your email be linked, unlinked, or anonymous?
A: unlink'd, fer sher
How do you FEEL about food? Why do you eat?
A: I want to put the whole outside in me.
What is your biggest flaw?
A: Weakness for abstract thought.
3 favorite authors
A: Haruki Murakami, Harry Crews, and Tanith Lee
What are the hallmarks of success in life?
A: Obesity, fast cars, and houses
What is your biggest mental fuck-up?
A: Predilection for handicapped girls
What is your favorite animal?
A: Puff the Magic Dragonne
A: Large lizard with droopy stoned eyes
How long do you usually know a girl before you kiss her?
A: either less than 2 hours or more than 5 years
How old were you when you first kissed?
A: people love babies
A: I was born with gender
A: I've never done it, maaaan.
Do you use recreational drugs?
A: brain chemicals
A: when the time is ripe
Have you ever been married/lived with someone?
A: It's all work, innit?
A: Miles Davis really cooked.
Do you know how to cook?
Do you like to cook?
What are the things you cook best?
A: Fried chick'n, bouliebaise, boerf burginion, cheezesteak, hatian banana soup
Have you ever used any of the following (which?): gel hairspray mousse cologne deodorant conditioner zitcream aftershave
What was the most crazy thing you ever did as an adolescent?
A: Quit to be college student.
as a college student?
A: Quit to be a werkin stiff.
as a working stiff?
A: Remained the same.
If you were a fruit or a vegetable, what would you be?
A: A lime.
If I were, what would I be?
A: A coconut. Or a pommegranite. Or a quince.
If you were at a party, and across the room you saw a very handsome man and your girlfriend chatting quite animatedly, what would you do?
A: Animatedly? Like Hungarians?
Do you think there is life after death?
On other planets?
Are you psychic?
Do you think you have any sort of understanding of what it would be like to completely insane?
A: Because I don't do well on complex binary questions.
Were you ever in the armed forces?
Did you ever kiss a girl who had big, hairsprayed bangs?
What was the most important scientific achievement in the last 50 years?
A: Big hairsprayed bangs like a punk rocker or a poodlehead?
What is the biggest problem...
...all women have?
A: I've known women with no discernable problems of any kind.
...all men have?
A: Penis too small (less than 24 inches is too small).
...with our society?
A: Too much value placed on the sanctity of human life.
Which do you prefer:
If you won $1 million, what would be the very first thing you would buy?
A: My freedom.
A: A lime soda.
A: A pistol.
Who has been the greatest influence in your life?
A: My baby boy.
How do people describe you?
A: A young Danny Kaye. Or a white Dennis Rodman. (I hate sports.)
How do you describe yourself?
A: The best thing since canned fish.
Do you subscribe to any magazines/newspapers?
What are your favorite shoes?
A: Engineer's Boots
A: "You are not going to pay a lot for this muffler, baby."