webshite/applications submitted

Thu Jun 27 14:39:42 1996

Name:
A: Felixx the Technoweenie

Email:
A: kshortland@sbnsw.com.au

How do you FEEL about food? Why do you eat?
A: What is food?? I am fed by a drip so i don't have to leave my pc.

What is your biggest flaw?
A: My ram is too small

3 favorite authors
A: dr seuss was the last author i read...then i bought a pc

What are the hallmarks of success in life?
A: More ram, bigger hard drive, flatbed scanner and a color laser printer

What is your biggest mental fuck-up?
A: You mean you can't tell yet???

What is your favorite animal?
A: pentium 200 Mmmmm...
Describe it.
A: Hard and shiny and fast and powerful

How long do you usually know a girl before you kiss her?
A: 3 e-mails
Jump her?
A: 5 e-mails
Dump her?
A: when i find someone who gives better e-mail

How old were you when you first kissed?
A: 13
Had sex
A: 16
Smoked Pot?
A: 18

Do you use recreational drugs?
A: Yes

What?
A: Mmmm silicon chips (and acid)

When?
A: Mmmm all the time...

Still?
A: Yes

Have you ever been married/lived with someone?
A: Neither

Who worked?
A: Work??
Who cooked?
A: Cook?
Who cleaned?
A: Clean?? i don't understand...

Do you know how to cook?
A: No

Do you like to cook?
A: No

What are the things you cook best?
A: pringles, potatoe chips, anything home delivered

Have you ever used any of the following (which?): gel hairspray mousse cologne deodorant conditioner zitcream aftershave
A: my pc doesn't mind how i look

What was the most crazy thing you ever did as an adolescent?
A: Bought a commodore 64
as a college student?
A: bought an apple ][ e
as a working stiff?
A: Work?? I still don't understand....

If you were a fruit or a vegetable, what would you be?
A: an apple :-)
If I were, what would I be?
A: a bannana

If you were at a party, and across the room you saw a very handsome man and your girlfriend chatting quite animatedly, what would you do?
A: cut off her internet access

Do you think there is life after death?
A: Yes

On other planets?
A: Yes

Are you psychic?
A: Yes

Do you think you have any sort of understanding of what it would be like to completely insane?
A: Yes

Why?
A: You really need to ask???

Were you ever in the armed forces?
A: No

Did you ever kiss a girl who had big, hairsprayed bangs?
A: No

What was the most important scientific achievement in the last 50 years?
A: Windows 95

What is the biggest problem...

...all women have?
A: not knowing my e-mail address

...all men have?
A: not yet perfecting virtual sex

...with our society?
A: not enough pentium's

Which do you prefer:
A: Plants

Why?
A: too god damn hard to smoke animals

If you won $1 million, what would be the very first thing you would buy?
A: more ram

The second?
A: more ram and a joystick

The last?
A: a mac

Who has been the greatest influence in your life?
A: Bill Gates

How do people describe you?
A: People???

How do you describe yourself?
A: Pentium...

Do you subscribe to any magazines/newspapers?
A: No

Which?
A:

What are your favorite shoes?
A: Shoes???

Additional Comments
A: I am not really a computer, i am actually a 6'1, 225 lb jock who is good at writing crap...hope you enjoyed.


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